Monday, June 26, 2006

Why I think my landscapers LOVE Me

Or hate me depending on your perspective. My roommate & I had always taken care of the hardworking ourselves but two summers ago it got to the point where it was a pain in the ass. It was clear we had two options 1)Get a goat or 2) Hire a landscaper. We went with the second option; the money the landscaper would cost was far less than the cost of feeding and cleaning up after a goat.

Some phone calls and inquiries were made and we eventually found a local company that didn't laugh at our small yard. As a bonus we discovered they were capable of closing the gates when they were done! Two previous companies lost our account because that was too much to ask. And let me tell you nothing is worse than chasing a rottie around the neighborhood barefoot.

Each spring the landscape company begins their rounds and our day is assigned. Not a big deal. The crew usually shows up at some point during our assigned day & they usually knock first so we can bring in any dogs that may be outside. Sounds great right?

Let me set a scene for you, April of this year it was a beautiful day the windows in the house were open curtains were pulled back to let the air in. I had just gotten out of the shower and I was wrapped in a towel pondering what I was gonna wear. I finally decided what I was gonna wear, dropped my towel and looked up. When I looked up I looked right at this years landscaping crew!! I had the look, you know the one deer get when they are caught in headlights? Yeah that is the look I had. I recovered quickly, grabbing my towel & screaming for my roommate.

It is now June pretty close to July and the new crew of landscapers (I think I scared off the first crew) have resumed their mid-day visits and I have learned to draw the curtains prior to dropping my towel. Then Thursday night happened! Thursday night I got home from taking Jamaica to the lake and decided to get comfy. I took a quick shower, put on a tank top and boxers and once the dogs were settled outside for last outs I poured myself a big old adult beverage.

Now anyone who knows me well can tell you my hearing is not so good. If there is background noise I cant hear for shit. Sometimes a loud noise can be right outside the window & I have no clue where it is coming from. There I sat in my ass grove on the couch, getting to know my remote control when I heard what sounded like a lawnmower. Only it could not possible be a lawnmower since it was 8:30 at night.

Then I peered out the living room window. I think I said something along the lines of "What the fuck?" as I watched one of the kids head around back where I had 4 dogs out in the paddock with the lawnmower thingy. I FLEW out the front door totally forgetting about my outfit. You know the flimsy tank top that did NOT have any type of shelf bra in it & the piggy boxers from the Gap yelling "STOP DON'T OPEN THE GATE!!" Those that know me are laughing cause they know Mel without a bra is NOT pretty. For those that don't know me start laughing. . .A lot.

The kid on the lawnmower thingy stopped and said he would meet me around back so that I could give him the OK once it was safe & the dogs weren't out back. SO I go thru the house let in the dogs and waive the kid in. He proceeds to talk to me about each of the dogs as I start to realize that I am wearing a tank top, no bra & piggy boxers. I don't think I have been that red in the face in a long time. I just walked away, laughing hysterically that once again I gave the landscapers a show.


Anonymous Anonymous said...

for those of us that dont know you could you post a photo of said outfit so we can draw our own conclusion . please

10:13 AM  
Anonymous Melody said...

So WHY are you not dating one of these landscapers....were any of them worth it???/!!!!

7:52 PM  

Post a Comment

<< Home